“This is not a good year for famous couples.”
–New York magazine, December 14, 2010
“2009 was a big year for celebrity breakups.”
–Hollywire, December 27, 2009
“2007 was full of celebrity breakups.”
–Bonny’s Dating Blog, December 26, 2007
“It has been a bad year for celebrity marriages.”
–Daily Mirror, December 27, 2006
Ok, everyone, once and for all, can we please retire this trope? Guess what: Every year is a bad year for celebrity marriages.
Celebrities are all horrible narcissists. They travel constantly, they have 24/7 access to willing sexual partners, they’re millionaires, they’re smoking hot, and they’re used to getting exactly what they want. They do not have normal lives, and they are not normal people. The fact that they cannot manage to build a decades-long bond with another human being is not shocking. Let’s all agree, right now, to stop being shocked.
When Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie break up, we’ll take it in stride. When Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher eventually divorce, we’ll shrug. Even when Matt Damon and his adorable, normal-seeming wife announce their inevitable amicable split, we’ll play it cool even though we might die a little inside.
We will steadfastly refuse to be shocked, because we know the truth: Every single celebrity couple except Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward breaks up eventually. And guess what: Joanne Woodward was Paul Newman’s second wife.