Today the New York Times published a story that was either about a golf tournament or an epic orgy. As Dave Barry might say, I’m not making this up.
Limping, Tiger Woods Withdraws After 9 Holes
“I was trying to draw that ball out there just a little bit; I pushed forward and just didn’t feel good.” – Tiger Woods
“Everything started getting tight.” – Tiger Woods
“I’m having a hard time walking.” – Tiger Woods
“Woods said he was surprised he had to withdraw.”
“Asked if would have been wiser to come off earlier, Woods replied, ‘Probably.’”
“The more rest I get, the better it would be, obviously.” – Tiger Woods
“Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to finish.” – Tiger Woods
Nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more.
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